By Jacqueline Whitmore, author of “Poised for Success: Mastering the Four Qualities That Distinguish Outstanding Professionals”
Dining with bread-dunking, soup-slurping, finger-licking and teeth-picking offenders is never pleasant. But, CEOs call them their greatest liabilities. They are the employees who break bread with clients, but can actually break business relationships because of their lack of social skills and table manners.
What can a talented and experienced employee do to improve their atrocious table manners? Here is some food for thought to take control of the situation:
1. Watch your breadiquette.
Bread should never be eaten as a whole slice or even two halves. You’ll look more polished if you break off one bite-size piece, butter it and then eat it. And never butter your bread directly from the butter dish. Instead, transfer some butter from the butter dish to your bread plate. Never dunk bread in your soup or use it to sop up sauces or juice on your plate.
2. No chivalry when it’s about business.
The business arena is gender neutral nowadays, therefore men are not required to pull out a woman’s chair or stand when a woman approaches or leaves the table during business meals. And whoever reaches the door first, regardless of gender, should open it for the other person.
3. Try it, you’ll like it.
There may be times when you’re served a dish you dislike or you’d rather not eat. Try it anyway. If you don’t eat what you’re served, you run the risk of insulting your host. Eat what you can then move the rest around on your plate. Pretend to take a few bites and engage in conversation with your dining companions.
4. Salt and pepper together.
Always pass the salt and pepper shakers together, even if someone asks you to pass one or the other. It’s best to keep them together as a set in the event someone else at the table wants both. Never pass them from hand to hand as this is considered bad luck in some cultures. Place them in front of the receiver and allow him to pick them up.
5. What hits the floor stays there.
If you drop a piece of silverware on the floor while having dinner in a restaurant, leave it and ask the server for another. The only time you should pick up a dropped utensil is when dining at someone’s home.
6. Avoid chewable challenges.
Although succulent spareribs and Alaskan king crab may top your list of favorite foods, you’ll be better off if you avoid these delectable delights during business meals. Steer clear of foods that are slippery, stringy, messy, cumbersome, unpredictable or difficult to maneuver.
7. Napkins only on your lap.
Don’t tuck your napkin into your collar or use it as a handkerchief. Place it on your lap after the host (if there is one) removes his/her napkin from the table. If you get up for any reason, place the napkin on your chair to let the server know you will be returning. Place the napkin on the left side of the plate when you have finished eating.
8. Don’t jump right in after the food is served.
Wait until everyone at your table has been served before you begin eating. When you are seated with a very large group, you may start eating after four or five people next to you have been served.
9. No need to constantly say ‘thank you’.
It’s a nice gesture to thank your server for refilling your beverage or removing your empty plate, but your gratitude can be conveyed with a smile, an occasional thank you and a generous tip. Repeatedly speaking to your server can be distracting.
10. Think of others first.
Before you serve yourself, it’s courteous to offer some food to your neighbor first, and then serve yourself second. In most cases, food should be passed around a table in a counterclockwise direction.
Jacqueline Whitmore is an internationally recognized etiquette expert, the founder of The Protocol School of Palm Beach and the author of “Poised for Success: Mastering the Four Qualities That Distinguish Outstanding Professionals“. For more etiquette tips, visit her website:www.EtiquetteExpert.com or her blog: www.JacquelineWhitmore.com.
